Invisible

Do not move me, for I am weak and will most certainly crumble.
Do not tempt me, for I am too thin a spirit to survive.
Do not hold me, for I will slip from your grasp.
Do not listen to me, for I could not bear the weight of our conversation.
Look through me, for I will not stop your gazing eyes.

Another Birthday

"The secret to staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.:
Lucille Ball 1911-1989, American Actress, Producer

It's a week before my birthday. Not that it's such a huge deal, at my age anyway. I don't want to be young again. Too much insecurity and too many unanswered questions when you're young.

However, I do want to feel young. What I would give for the endless energy and my original hair color. When you're young you can decide to loose 10 pounds and two weeks later after cutting back on beer consumption and the late night drive-thru's you've kissed that 10 pounds goodbye. When you age, you body wises up to that trick and it goes into self-preservation mode. BODY -"I believe you'll be starving me over the next couple of weeks, so I'd better hang on to what I've got. Anyway, what would happen if we're stranded in a blizzard for a month or two?" Thank heavens it's thinking for me. Otherwise I would surely freeze to death in that blizzard.

When you're young, trips to the beauty salon are quick, inexpensive and infrequent. When you age, you plan your life around your next hair appointment. "Go to the Bahamas next weekend? I'd love too, but sorry I can't go, I have a hair appointment." Who wants to go to the Bahamas with a gray stripe down the middle of their head? Someone might mistake you for an older woman who should be at home knitting something.

Even though my aging body likes to remind me that I'm getting older I don't mind. With age comes wisdom, wit, appreciation and a different kind of beauty that can only be seen by the most sincere.

The Knight

I once knew a knight in shining silver armour. His armour protected him from the flames of the many dragons he slew as he rode fearlessly into battle on his screaming red horse.

The knight knew no enemies among his people and was greatly loved and admired for his courage and bravery.

Each day the noble knight carefully placed himself inside of his steely protection. He proudly wore the armour and grew accustomed to it although it was often uncomfortable and chaffed at his skin.

One day as he awoke, a small, seeminlgy harmless fly bit the knight squarely on his shoulder. Upon feeling the sting of the bite, the knight brushed the fly away and thought nothing more of it. But the fly's bite had pierced the knights skin and it began to burn, itch and fester underneath the shining metal exterior. The knight, who's skin rarely saw the sun or felt the rain, was soon consumed with pain as his skin retreated from the ever growing infection caused by the bite. Even so, he refused to put aside his protective armour and continued to wear it each day so as not to alarm his countrymen who counted on his strength for protection. Each day he grew weaker, although he did not seek assistance for his quickly ailing health.

One morning the knight was so weak he could not rise from his bed. He called out for assistance, but he was not heard for his voice was not strong enough for anyone to hear. The noble knight lay helpless in his bed until the infection, which had ravaged his body, stopped his heart from beating.

It was not long after, that his presence was missed in the township and a courier was dispatched to the knights dwelling with an invitation requesting his presence for a meeting with the king. It was only then that anyone realized the illness that had brought about the demise of the knight, but it was too late. The beautiful shining armour that had protected the knight from the danger of the outside world, could not protect him from himself.

The Journey

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step" - Lao Tzŭ

How brave you must be to take that initial step...it's the single most important step of your life. Can you commit to it? Can you stay on your journey when the path is narrow and the road less fortunate. Will you be able to keep your eyes on the path and not stray, so as to prolong your journey. But what joy awaits at the end of your journey? How do you know it will be worth the undertaking? We must have the courage to take this single step and the bravery to attempt the journey and remember that we are not alone in our quest.

Who

I recently came across this document I wrote shortly after Hurricane Katrina struck New Orleans.

Blame Game

Who is to blame?
Is it you, Mr. Mayor, who did not load us up on buses, trains, boats or anything that would lead us away from the inevitable?
Is it you, Mrs. Governor, who did not understand the immediate need for evacuation of a city below sea level?
Is it you, Army Corp of Engineers, for not building up these levees to withstand the deluge of rain brought on by powerful hurricanes?
Is it you, Senators and Congressmen, for not ensuring the dollars provided to build up this city were spent wisely?
Is it you, Mr. Brown, for not hearing our pleas and ending the hell that came after?
Is it you, Mr. President, for assuming everyone else was taking care of us?
Is it me, myself, for blindly believing in a system?
A system of levees that have done their job so well for so long,,
A system of political appointees who I believe care about me and my family?
I think it is you, Mother Nature.
You draw us to the shores with your beautiful sunrises and views of never ending nothingness. You mesmerize us into believing we are immune to your danger and we come to believe your showy storms are nothing more than an inconvenience.
Are we to blame you, Mother Nature?
Yes, but only for the destruction you brought to to many families.
The destruction of each other we can blame only on ourselves.

A Call from Home

He wasn't here long enough,
I said, when he answered the call to come home,
But you've only just begun,
I said, when he turned and walked out the door.

Well what am I to do?
I said, while I watched him walk away,
Remember me and the life we shared
and we'll see each other again.

Choc-o-lots

Lately, for some reason, every afternoon around the same time I get an almost unnatural urge to consume chocolate. The craving is causing me to wonder what's going on. So, I found myself doing a little research into my need to speed to the candy machine.

PROS:

1.Chocolate stimulates the release of endorphins, natural body hormones that generate feelings of pleasure and well-being.

With this time of "natural high" I should eat chocolate every day. I'd probably be a lot less bitchy.

2.Many women report particular chocolate cravings when pre-menstrual. This is possibly because chocolate contains magnesium, a shortage of which can exacerbate pre-menstrual tension.

See my remarks for #1.

3. Central nervous stimulants such as caffeine are also present in small amounts, and this has a mild effect on alertness as we know from drinking coffee. Another mild stimulant present in chocolate is theobromine, which also serves to relax the smooth muscles in the linings of the lung.


Helps you stay alert and breath better? This is getting good.

4. Chocolate contains a natural 'love drug'. Tryptophan is a chemical that the brain uses to make a neurotransmitter called serotonin. High levels of serotonin can produce feelings of elation, even ecstasy - hence the name of the designer drug that also works by increasing serotonin levels.

Scary...probably means I'd be an addict to ecstasy too.

5. Californian scientist Professor Carl Keen and his team have suggested that chocolate might help fight heart disease. They say that it contains chemicals called flavinoids, which thin the blood, helping to prevent clotting. Scientists have already suggested that red wine acts in this way. However, sceptics have pointed out that Keen's research is funded by confectionery maker Mars.

Net net, drink red wine and eat chocolate to live longer if you believe the study.

CONS: (Although hard to find of course there has to be some)

1. People who eat too much chocolate have a lower life expectancy. Chocolate's high fat content means that excess indulgence can contribute to obesity, leading to an increased risk of heart disease.

Doesn't that contractdict PRO #5? I guess it's eat, drink and be dead.

2. Dogs and other domestic animals like horses metabolise the chocolate ingredient theobromine more slowly than humans. Safe doses for us could be toxic or even lethal doses for our pets, affecting their hearts, kidneys and central nervous systems.

Keep your chocolate away from Rover and Mr. Ed. More for me anyway.

Chocolate has so many good qualities and, as with most things we love that are not always good for us, moderation is the key. But every now and then, I say it's okay to give in and eat an entire king size Hershey bar...right?

Litters Buggin' Me

Yesterday I had the unfortunate position of being behind a large SUV on the interstate who's inhabitants decided to pitch their garbage out the window. This occured while travelling upwards of 80 mph which meant their cups of whatever flew threw the air and splashed unidentifiable liquids onto my car and possibly the car behind me all while leaving their trashy mark on the roadside.

I was amazed, or maybe it was shock, to see such blatantly stupid people that I moved up closer behind the vehicle so that I could get the license plate number. They were from Maryland. I noted down the plate number. Then what...who should I call to report litter bugs? I sped up so that I could pass them and give them the EVIL EYE. The SUV was full of young, college aged kids who looked to be laughing and playfully swatting at each other. They ignored my evil eye. They ignored me all together. I would've needed screaming sirens and flashing blue lights to even warrant a second glance from these knuckleheads. Spring breakers, I decided. Spring breakers with little, if any, consideration for the fact that now everyone on the interstate gets to view their crap on the highway until some underpaid county worker gets the joy of picking it up. Other visitors to our state will look at the crap and say, "This place is full of crap!", when in reality it's probably their neighbor's kids in Maryland who trashed the place and kept speeding along in their gas guzzling SUV without a care in the world.

Life in the Slow Lane

Tired of the rat race? Me too. Tired of trying to impress the unimpressable with your skills and talent? Me too. Tired of trying to fend off the never ending stream of fresh faced, gung ho collegiates who are willing to work themselves to a premature death just to get an attaboy from the boss? Yep, me too.

To some people, work is their life. Maybe they like what they do or better yet, maybe the love what they do. I personally think these people are about as rare as a great Ben Affleck movie.

I feel that most of us get up, leave our homes and voluntarily spend the bulk of our day with a lot of people we don't like and only a couple that we do like, because we haven't followed our dream, but instead followed the dollar.

So everyday I get up and follow the dollar. I try not to care when the unimpressable are unimpressed. I try to sympathize with the fresh faced, gung ho collegiates who will wake up one day and realize what's really important and I go home at night and continue to dream.

American Idol-aholic

Hello, my name is Deb and I'm an Idol-aholic. Yes I'm too old to watch it, yes it's junk food for the brain and yes there is plenty of other things I should be doing, but I can't help it. It's the only television show I watch routinely, so I guess that means I'm hooked.

I hate to admit it, but last week I even called in to vote. It's free, so no guilt about wasting money unless you're one of those that believes time is money, in that case it costs be about an hour to get through. It's amazing to me how many of them can't believe how crappy they sing. Is seems everyone they know has told them how great they are their entire lives and they swagger into the audition to do their thing and WHAM...they suck! They seem stunned and in total denial of what the "judges" say about their talent. How could that be? Well, that would mean everyone's been lying to you or you just suck less than they do. Ha-ha, that's entertainment!

Although I do enjoy watching the show, I must say that music is more than just a lead singer, it's about being a musician. If Mick Jagger was on Idol, I doubt he'd get far. He'd probably be cut during auditions for being too skinny with big lips. I also doubt that Aretha Franklin would make it through auditions because Simon couldn't get past the fact that she isn't model thin. Do we really need another Brittney Spears? I'd say one is quite enough. I like to LISTEN to music not just watch it being performed. Who cares what they look like, how do they SOUND?

So, the show must go on and there I'll be three nights a week, wasting my time but cheering for my favorites.

What happened to Physical Education?

I have a son in elementary school. He attends PE class once every other Wednesday alternating with Art class.

What is going on here? There are stories every day about kids battling adult onset diabetes, high blood pressure and other debilitating diseases usually only found in adults. Everyone stands around scratching their heads on how to address the problem. How about reinstating PE every day for 30 minutes?

Kids need to be kids....not that PE should replace Science, Math, English and History. These are just as necessary to the childs growth. However, I feel that children would be much more attentive if they've also had a chance to work off some energy. Exercise has been proven to increase your ability to think clearly, also known as a benefit to your mental health. Here are just a few of the benefits of exercise:

Reduces the risk of premature death
Reduces the risk of developing and/or dying from heart disease
Reduces high blood pressure or the risk of developing high blood pressure
Reduces high cholesterol or the risk of developing high cholesterol
Reduces the risk of developing colon cancer and breast cancer
Reduces the risk of developing diabetes
Reduces or maintains body weight or body fat
Builds and maintains healthy muscles, bones, and joints
Reduces depression and anxiety
Improves psychological well-being
Enhanced work, recreation, and sport performance

Any of these problems sound familiar?

Maybe I'm just more sensative to the issue because I have boys. Boys just naturally have tons of energy. Ever notice how many boys are diagnosed with ADD or ADHD these days? Parents are told to medicate their children, (often by teachers themselves), to assist them in concentrating and focusing. Since when is a teacher also the family physician? Now they are finding that some of these drugs cause depression in children. If your teacher and parents are telling you something is wrong with you, you believe them because you're a kid.

What are the excuses for little to no PE? Buget cuts? No time in the school day? I don't believe that! I lived in a very small town when I grew up. Times were much tougher then on everyone, yet even our small elementary school had the money and the time to squeeze in 30 minutes of PE every day of the week. ADD & ADHD were unheard of as were children as old as 9 being diagnosed with adult onset diabetes and obesity.

What happened to the Arts? Don't get me started.

Banana-rama

I love bananas. As my favorite brand Chiquita's advertising campaign states, they are, "quite possibly the world's perfect food". They're compact, portable and when you're done eating them the peels are bio-degradable. I dare to say there aren't many people in the world who don't love bananas, not to mention monkeys and apes of all sizes. Even Elvis loved bananas.

Recently I brought one of my fruit friends to work. Chiquita, of course, my favorite brand. I noticed the particular fruit I had picked had the small blue Chiquita sticker still attached. "Brain Fuel" it said, in large white letters. Hmmm..I like it. Thanks Chiquita for giving me the ability to re-fuel my brain. Heaven knows I need it. I removed the sticker and stuck it to my desk, for future reference.

A few days later, I brought another fruit friend....again with the blue Chiquita sticker. This sticker read, "Place Sticker on Forehead. Smile." I remember doing just that as a child. Not only that but fighting for the sticker with my brothers and sisters...the winner, wore the blue Chiquita sticker proudly on their forehead while marching around to the sour looks of the fallen sticker head wannabees. Thanks Chiquita.

Read all you ever wanted to know about Chiquita and the history of their stickers. Did you know they still place each sticker on by hand? www.chiquita.com

Au Revoir, Old New Orleans

The St.Amant, DuCote and Hyde family of Old New Orleans, LA
I have visited the old New Orleans many times as my oldest and dearest friend lived there, until Katrina. In the old New Orleans you could sip coffee and eat beignets at Cafe Du Monde without a second thought about the levee holding back the river. You could watch the street performers and artists in the French Quarter, catch a ferry boat to cross the river, or just stay home and order a daccarri from your local drive-thru daccarri store. (Yes, I said drive-thru.) The city and the people of the old New Orleans were tightly woven together, one seemingly dependent on the other.

My friend and her entire family lived in the same neighborhood in St. Bernard Parish. They left the old New Orleans the day before Katrina hit, except for her husband who decided to remain behind and ride out the storm. He was found four days later by a Good Morning America news crew and featured on the program the next day as "The Last Man Standing". His story is harrowing to say the least. They have since relocated to Indiana, which is just about as far away from a coastline as you can get.

Last week they returned to the new New Orleans, to salvage what remained of their homes and lives. She called me as she travelled back to Indiana. She told me she had started crying, uncontrollably when she was two miles from what was her home. She spoke with a sadness in her voice about ordering a po' boy and how they asked "How you want it dressed?", how she saw an old friend who asked, "Where you at?". She misses this familiarity and feeling of home. It was a place like no other.

If you never had a chance to visit the old New Orleans, you're too late. Yes, in the new New Orleans, you can still sip coffee at Cafe Du Monde and I'm sure the French Quarter, which sustained minimal damage, has returned to life post Katrina. My friend even mentioned that she found a drive-thru daccarri store open. But the soul of the city has left, at least for now, for Indiana.

Stop to Smell the Roses

As with most working mothers my life can get very hectic. There is the two + hours per day I spend commuting to and from work, then dinner, homework, baths and finally sleep only to get up and do it all over again. It's a treadmill sort of existence that forces me to take a lot for granted and often makes me more than a little irritable.

I was in this frame of mind one night recently when my son asked me to take a look at a web site for kids that he likes. My job requires me to stare at a computer screen all day, so when I'm not at work, looking at a computer ranks right up there with cleaning up dog poop and scrubbing toilets. So, I put him off and told him "not now I'm busy". He shrugged his shoulders and I went about whatever it was I was doing at the time. An hour or so later he asked me again...again I put him off..."maybe later" was my response. Just when I thought he'd totally forgotten and given up, he asked again. "OK" I replied, "but make it snappy."

He began explaining that his friend had shown him how to create a profile for the web site so that they could send messages to each other. There were several questions that he'd had to answer when he created the profile, favorite foods - pizza and maccaroni and cheese, favorite cartoon - Foster's Home and something called Bobo bo bobobobobo (whatever, don't ask), favorite color - red, etc. At the bottom of the list of questions he read, "Favorite Role Model". His answer, "Mom and Dad".

To Sis, with love on Valentines

My sisters and I rarely see each other anymore. They both still live in the state where I grew up. My husband and I moved away several years ago when our kids were still young. Yesterday I received an e-mail from one of them.."I'm bloggin" was the subject. I've heard of blogging and read some blogs created by journalists in Iraq, but never thought of actually creating one myself. This particular sister has always had a natural ability to create art in many forms. I immedately clicked the link attached to her e-mail. The blogs are perfectly written and beautifully displayed, a testament to her years in marketing and journalism. Some of the entries made me smile. There were poems and links to other sites of interest. They are a small glimpse into what my sister might be thinking about or feeling on that day. I immedately signed up to create my own blog site. I think my sister will be pleased. Immitation is the finest form of flattery.